Beautifully written, Henry. It brings back the bittersweet memories of those three years your father and I spent apart. I wrote to him every week from the US, but because our future was so uncertain, he seldom replied—he didn't want to hold me back.
Times certainly changed by the time you and Jaclyn were flying between NY and SF every weekend! The eras change, but that deep, enduring commitment to love through the distance stays exactly the same. I'm so proud of you, and I love your insight.
This is so beautiful! Each of the stories showed a different expression of love, and each touched my heart. Yours of connection and closeness, your father's of sacrifice. So beautifully written. Thank you for sharing this story💚
What a wonderful piece. When my husband and I were dating in the 80s we saw each other for one week every six months for three years. He was in the Marine Corps so there were other six month separations.
Our son, however, followed his girlfriend to Cincinnati for her doctorate program. Everyone does handle the possibility of separation differently.
There’s something so moving about how each of you filled the silence differently, calls, silence, and letters. And yet all of it was love, just in different languages. X
This was beautiful. And I, too, am not cut out for long distance. I don’t know how the previous generations did it with nothing but handwritten letters!
Thanks AJ! Yeah it’s really unfathomable to me some of the things they had to put up with but I guess back then there was no better alternative so you didn’t know any better.
Ugh, Superstorm Sandy. I was in New Hope, PA still. The storm hit the day after I moved into my own place post-divorce. Power was out for a week, so I moved back in with my ex for seven of the most awkward days of my life. All was civil, and it helped our kids that all of us were together in the aftermath. Love how you weave the generational narrative of long distance relationships. Wonderful read.
It was fine. Disruption came years later, when I was in a different hurricane, on a foreign island, and was grateful to escape 6 days after a Cat 5+ direct hit. Funny how one super dramatic moment in a life can be rendered a minor inconvenience further down the road, as life keeps doling out adventures.
I’ve been in a long distance relationship for 3 years and I think it’s challenging in the digital age!! I can’t imagine what your mother was going through.
Thanks for sharing! I love reading about your family 🩵
I thought of your mum and dad instantly when I saw this Henry, but for you and your wife to do long distance as well? Another generation, another love story expressed the same level of depth. Regardless of resources that were, or were not available to you all.
I saw this in my inbox at the start of the day and I've been counting the seconds until I could get the chance to read it and it was worth the wait. My husband and I did long distance at the start of our relationship, him in Mexico and me in London. I, like you, hate long distance. I saved up money and brought him over to London. :) the idea of a powerless New York city is so interesting to me. Love how you connect your life experiences with those of your father. II saw this
This piece really captures it — the more I talk to my own parents about their early years apart, the more I realize how much long distance shaped that entire generation's relationships, just expressed in such different ways than we'd recognize today.
It's strange to think my mom and dad's version of "staying connected" was letters into silence.
I admire your wife so much for her determination, fortitude, and for knowing that you two would be together. Thank you for sharing this story. I'm trying not to cry, especially because I'm going to go back and read some of the others I've missed. 🤗
Beautifully written, Henry. It brings back the bittersweet memories of those three years your father and I spent apart. I wrote to him every week from the US, but because our future was so uncertain, he seldom replied—he didn't want to hold me back.
Times certainly changed by the time you and Jaclyn were flying between NY and SF every weekend! The eras change, but that deep, enduring commitment to love through the distance stays exactly the same. I'm so proud of you, and I love your insight.
This is so beautiful! Each of the stories showed a different expression of love, and each touched my heart. Yours of connection and closeness, your father's of sacrifice. So beautifully written. Thank you for sharing this story💚
Thank you so much Thorn!
What a wonderful piece. When my husband and I were dating in the 80s we saw each other for one week every six months for three years. He was in the Marine Corps so there were other six month separations.
Our son, however, followed his girlfriend to Cincinnati for her doctorate program. Everyone does handle the possibility of separation differently.
Wow over 3 years! Hard to imagine this all given how soft I am but big thanks for his service
At least I got to visit him in Vienna and then Guatemala City.
There’s something so moving about how each of you filled the silence differently, calls, silence, and letters. And yet all of it was love, just in different languages. X
Thanks so much Claire. I for sure did it the least gracefully
This was beautiful. And I, too, am not cut out for long distance. I don’t know how the previous generations did it with nothing but handwritten letters!
Thanks AJ! Yeah it’s really unfathomable to me some of the things they had to put up with but I guess back then there was no better alternative so you didn’t know any better.
"Every night, we would FaceTime, not always to talk, but just to feel like the other person was in the room next door"
I do the same, wonderful line and wonderful piece. Thanks for sharing, I wish you a wonderful day
Thanks Nick!
Ugh, Superstorm Sandy. I was in New Hope, PA still. The storm hit the day after I moved into my own place post-divorce. Power was out for a week, so I moved back in with my ex for seven of the most awkward days of my life. All was civil, and it helped our kids that all of us were together in the aftermath. Love how you weave the generational narrative of long distance relationships. Wonderful read.
Oh wow that is disruption at the next level! Glad it was civil though must have been mentally exhausting!
It was fine. Disruption came years later, when I was in a different hurricane, on a foreign island, and was grateful to escape 6 days after a Cat 5+ direct hit. Funny how one super dramatic moment in a life can be rendered a minor inconvenience further down the road, as life keeps doling out adventures.
I’ve been in a long distance relationship for 3 years and I think it’s challenging in the digital age!! I can’t imagine what your mother was going through.
Thanks for sharing! I love reading about your family 🩵
3 years is a looong time though. I was just 4 months before I cracked!
I thought of your mum and dad instantly when I saw this Henry, but for you and your wife to do long distance as well? Another generation, another love story expressed the same level of depth. Regardless of resources that were, or were not available to you all.
Thanks Henry and family ❤️
Thank you Kelly though I think I can barely qualify for long distance. It was pretty short in the grand scheme of things but felt long to me
This was such a meaningful read. Thank you for sharing your story. ❤️
Thanks Steena!
I saw this in my inbox at the start of the day and I've been counting the seconds until I could get the chance to read it and it was worth the wait. My husband and I did long distance at the start of our relationship, him in Mexico and me in London. I, like you, hate long distance. I saved up money and brought him over to London. :) the idea of a powerless New York city is so interesting to me. Love how you connect your life experiences with those of your father. II saw this
Thanks Jade! I agree long distance stinks. And somehow I got to experience a powerless NYC twice. Definitely surreal
So beautiful! I cannot wait for the full memoir!!
Thank you Maire!
This piece really captures it — the more I talk to my own parents about their early years apart, the more I realize how much long distance shaped that entire generation's relationships, just expressed in such different ways than we'd recognize today.
It's strange to think my mom and dad's version of "staying connected" was letters into silence.
Thanks Ricky, yes it really was the norm back then
It's a fun read, and a great story!
Thanks so much for reading!
Such a poignant post, Henry. Amazing how love and distance affected each of you so differently. Thank you for sharing this!
I’m just a lot weaker of the four of us in the story 😅. Thank you for reading
I don't think so! It's a good example of giving in that isn't weakness!
I admire your wife so much for her determination, fortitude, and for knowing that you two would be together. Thank you for sharing this story. I'm trying not to cry, especially because I'm going to go back and read some of the others I've missed. 🤗
Aw thanks Pam. She is the strong one for sure